Dec 25th Merry Christmas

Just to say thank you to everyone who has joined me on the journey this Advent.  It is always a humbling thing to see that people are reading and sharing what I write - and it amazes me that every year there are new treasures to discover about what Jesus has done and is doing. 

 We havent managed to get to church on Christmas day for years but today we shall be going to celebrate with our church family and I have to confess its the bit I'm most looking forward to.   Yesterday at tea time Ben suddenly said ' Let's say grace!  ( we very rarely do that) and he prayed saying thank you to God for Christmas - a spontaneous outpouring of gratitude from a 12 year old for the excitement and joy which was creeping up on him by then .   This will be the first year ever that Keith will not have a parent with him to celebrate Christmas and Im sure he will feel the loss of his Mum at some point during the day and will be sad.   But regardless of circumstances, regardless of feelings, the truth is that God came.  He stayed.  He is with us and in us.  His name is powerful, His presence is mighty, His word is living and active and His spirit is gentle.  He is passionate about you and about me.  We are His.

I pray that you know and love Jesus more today than you have ever done and that in 2018 He reveals Himself to you in ways you could not imagine.
Lots of love and Merry Christmas

Caz xx

Dec 24th surprises

When was the last time you were surprised ( in a good way)?   I mean, really, truly, unexpectedly, mouth open, laugh-out-loud surprised?    It doesnt happen very often does it?  In fact I cant think of the last time I was surprised like I was yesterday.  Still reeling from the shock.

A couple of weeks ago a friend of mine told me that God had told her that she was to ' give me Christmas'.   She said she wanted to give me food for Christmas lunch and buy a  couple of small gifts for the boys.   I was surprised and delighted and blessed.  So I deleted turkey from the shopping list and told her one item from each boys christmas list that I hadnt yet bought.

Yesterday she turned up with a car full of stuff for us.  Not only a whole Christmas dinner complete with veg, trifle, christmas pudding and chocolate but a massive pile of presents for all of us.  Everything beautifully wrapped.  And I have no idea what is in any of the parcels which are now under the tree.   To say I was surprised would be an understatement !

Im deeply grateful to my friend for her generosity and kindness and hard work.  Amazing that someone would do that for us.  But Im even more grateful to the God who put my name on her heart to bless me this Christmas.  I have learned something over the years - that sometimes receiving is a lot harder than giving.  You have to work quite hard at having an open hand which humbly says ' thank you' with no sense of either entitlement or wounded pride.  No looking for a hidden agenda or calculating payback.  Just acceptance.

Tomorrow we shall be opening presents.  Most of us adults will have a pretty good idea of what is coming our way.  We won't be too surprised at the toiletries and gloves and sweets and tickets to events or clothes and trinkets.  They are lovely and we will appreciate the thought which goes into each one and the love with which they are given.   But the children....... they will probably ( hopefully) receive in a slightly different way.  With squeals and shouts.  With grins and delight.  And genuine surprise.    I used to love it when the boys were smaller and they would shout things like '  Mummy! How did Santa KNOW I wanted..... ? '    I love those Youtube videos of kids receiving things they have longed for - puppies, tickets to concerts  etc.  Tears of joy and screams of unadulterated excitement.   Why do we lose that as we get older.   Why do we become so staid and polite ?  😊

God is full of surprises.   He is overflowing with gifts to give.  He knows the secret desires of our hearts and He loves us beyond measure.   If He gave us His only Son, do you really think He will hold back the job, the house, the healing, the relationship, the baby, the peace, the whatever-it-is that we need and long for??    Every good and perfect gift comes from Him.  Yes, even the box of Maltesers and the Christmas socks  🎅.  Everything under the tree, the roof over our heads and the bed in which we sleep tonight - it's all a gift.   How do you receive it all?   Thankfully with an open hand, or impatiently, critically, ungratefully, jealously ?   We all have alot to learn. 

One more blog post tomorrow as we finish for another year.  Happy Christmas Eve  xx

Dec 23rd - swaddling

I realise that these blogs haven't been terribly Christmassy this year.  Partly I think that's because Facebook is showing me all the previous years' blogs every day and I don't want to repeat myself.  partly it's because it is hard to find something new and inspirational to say about a story we all know so well.

Until......  😇

Don't you just love it when you think you have squeezed every last possible drop of Truth out of a scripture and that there is no alternative interpretation to be had and then God blows you away with yet another layer??   Well that's what happened yesterday when I read something a friend had posted on Facebook .   It was about the shepherds.

Apparently the shepherds in the nativity story weren't just any ordinary shepherds.  The guys who raised sheep in the lands around Bethlehem were tasked with providing the sacrificial lambs for the
temple in Jerusalem.  So these guys would take particular care of their flocks and as soon as the ewes were ready to give birth would lead them to some caves where they would be sheltered and safe.  There the ewes would give birth and the shepherds would asses the male lambs, picking out those which were perfect and wrapping them up in swaddling cloths so that they would not get dirty or injured.  Because the lambs which were to be presented for sacrifice had to be utterly perfect without any blemish or fault.

So when the angels appeared in the sky and told the shepherds ' and this shall be a sign to you'   - well, it really was a sign specifically for them.  A hint that only they would fully appreciate.    They were told to go and look for a baby ' wrapped in swaddling clothes and lying in a manger' .........

Jesus came as the lamb of God.  Just like the lambs which, for generations. had been born in order to be offered as a sacrifice, Jesus was born in a cave and wrapped in sheets of cloth.  He was the one who was destined to be the last sacrifice.  Once and for all.

I've read and heard about the shepherds for fifty years and never heard that before.  Yet another layer of profound meaning.  Another fascinating detail.   Just LOVE it when God shows a deeper glimpse.
As we wait patiently ( or impatiently if you are my children) for tomorrow night  and the dawning of Christmas morning let us be full of wonder at the fact that however much we think we know there is always so so SO much more of God and His story to see and understand.   Spirit of Revelation open our eyes to see even more truth and Good News from Your word this coming year.

Dec 23rd -contactless

Im not quite sure what Im going to write about as I sit here at the keyboard , but today I got the distinct impression that I needed to start with that word  CONTACTLESS

There is something about this whole new thing of contactless payment which makes me inherently uneasy.  When it was first introduced ( and it really wasnt that long ago) I shied away from tapping my card on the screen of the machine and continued to punch in my four digit code.   I didn't trust the technology somehow.  Just a feeling.  It seemed all too convenient and I have somewhere in the back of my mind the verses in Revelation about the number of the beast.  There are already people experimenting with having a chip inserted under their skin so that they can dispense with the plastic card.    Eeeeeeek.  Slippery slope?  I've spent the afternoon wondering how long I'd survive if I couldn't buy or sell.  And whether I'd succumb to having a chip under my skin as quickly as I succumbed to tapping my card contactlessly.

Anyhow, that is a bit of a distraction really - because having started down that road I began to think of the word CONTACT-LESS and what it says about our world and the way it is going.   We seem to be on a downward spiral of speed and isolation.   We want things NOW  and we dont want to have to involve anyone else in getting them.  The world is making human interaction less and less necessary.  When my Grandmother was a girl she had to walk to school or cycle everywhere.  If she needed something she went to a shop where a shopkeeper would serve her.  Slowly and with conversation.  She wrote with pencil on paper ( although she did remember using chalk on slate when she was very small) had gas lighting in her home and never went further than the edge of her town.  She

remembered HER grandmother getting the very first vacuum cleaner  - which consisted of a pair of bellows with a hose attached.  Granny as a small child had to stamp up and down like mad on the bellows whilst her grandma wielded the nozzle to suck up the dust.  This was considered the height of newfangled technology!   A hundred years ago.   And now look at us!   It probably took my great grandmother several hours to hoover her house.  It takes me twenty minutes.  And if I had the right device I could sit in a chair and let the machine do it for me automatically!!

In many ways we are so blessed that much dangerous and difficult work which we used to have to do and which killed many so young is now done by machines.  It is wonderful that we can pick up a phone and speak to someone on the other side of the world.  It is a miracle that I can write this using photographs which someone took decades ago and that tomorrow it will be being read in America and Australia.  Astounding.   But....   but.....

There is a cost.  And the cost seems to be that with the mechanisation of just about everything we are losing contact with each other.   Our local bank is about to close because people are banking online nowadays.  Yes, more conveniently no doubt.  But that's one less person I shall see throughout the course of my day now.  I wont be popping in to the bank now and then to pay in or transfer or whatever.  I won't be having that brief chat with the person at the counter.  They won't be telling me that I could perhaps be getting a better rate on my account or asking when was the last time I spoke to an advisor about my mortgage.  I wont be bumping into the friend I haven't seen for ages and going for a coffee with them.  Because I shall be at home on the laptop doing my banking.   And I suspect my life with  be just fractionally poorer because of it.

I don't want a contactless life.

I think the world is going to increasingly push me into having one.  Which means that I am going to have to try doubly hard to keep the contacts I have and make new ones.   And make REAL ones, not virtual ones !   I think Im doing quite well in that all bar 4 of the 301 friends I have on facebook are people I really do actually know in my real life. 😊   Two of the four Ive never actually met are poetry people I've ' met'  through the Poetry Forum I write for,  the other two are friends of friends and are both church folks with whom I have made specific connections.  Internet conversations are no substitute for the real thing.  Emails can't give you a hug.  Tweets can't buy you a coffee.  It is probably no coincidence that in the most technological age ever people are the loneliest they have ever been.

And even when we are with real people in real time we are sometimes not with them at all

Jesus came to make contact with us.  he came to bring us into contact with God and with each other as a family.  Interconnected .  Relational.  Dependent.  We are made in the image of a triune God - if we become disconnected, isolated and screen-bound we will become like caged animals.  Shadows of who we were designed to be.   It is not good for man to be alone.
What happens in the world is more often than not a foreshadowing of what is happening in the spiritual realm.  Let us keep watch, be careful and wise and listen to the Father in coming days as this age draws to an end and we prepare for Jesus to come back.  It's probably not going to be an easy ride.

December 21st - Hope

Yesterday morning on the way to work I was listening to Radio 4.   The show was called Soul Music and it was all about the Christmas Carol ' O Holy Night'    I only caught half of it but it was really
beautiful.  Testimonies from lots of people for whom it has been a significant song - plus some history about the writing of it ( did you know it was written during the height of the abolition of slavery movement - which makes the verse about ' the slave is our brother' pretty poignant)  Towards the end of the piece someone was talking about hope.  And they said this.

Hope is believing in spite of the evidence and then watching the evidence change.*

Isn't that just fantastic??

We talk a lot about Hope at this time of year - but I'm not sure that many of us have really got a handle on what it means. Maybe it's not possible to fully understand it this side of heaven.  But I'd like to try.

Jesus came into a situation which was dire and impossible and dreadful and hopeless.  That was the evidence.  The religious leaders looked at what they saw before them - a carpenter, a rebel, a friend of tax collectors and prostitutes and in the face of the evidence they just could not believe that He was who he said He was.   But the disciples saw the very same things and decided to stick with Jesus, follow Him, watch Him,, learn from Him and as they did so they saw the evidence change in front of their eyes.   There was a dawning realisation that everything they knew from the scriptures was actually being fulfilled in this man.   Not in the way they had been taught to expect.   But undeniably so.

Jesus is into defying expectations.   If you are disappointed with God then I can guarantee that it is not because He is a God of disappointment, but because your expectations of Him were faulty from the start.   That can be tough to accept  ( trust me; been there, done that, got the t shirt)  But the good news is if we stick with Jesus, keep following Him, keep trusting Him, keep refusing to listen to the voice of despair He will change the evidence so that Truth is revealed. 

Because He is Truth.   Truth sets us free

This is Hope.


* attributed to Jim Wallis of Sojurners.  Google him  :)

Dec 20th - Just do it

This is very short and sweet.  Or bittersweet, depending on how you look at it 😊

The other evening I went round various bedrooms and gathered up the cups and plates etc which had mysteriously assembled there.  I wasn't planning on going back downstairs so I left them at the top of the staircase so that the next person who went down would take them to the kitchen.  The following morning the four wonderful men in my life all got up before I did.  They all went downstairs.  Then they all came upstairs again to brush their teeth, get their school bags, find their car keys etc.  Then they went downstairs again and got into the car.  Then someone forgot something and came in from the car, upstairs, downstairs and then they all left.  And yes, you've guessed it.  When I got up, there were the plates and cups still sitting at the top of the stairs.

And as I looked at them and said out loud '  How hard is it to see stuff which needs to go down and actually take it down??!!'  I felt God speak to me clear as day and say '  And how many things do you' not see' or choose to ignore or leave till later ?'.    He meant God things.  I got the point.

God sometimes -  often -  daily sets things out for us to trip over.  Blessings to enjoy, projects to undertake, people to talk to, words to impart, prayers to pray.  And so often we walk past, don't follow the nudge, take the hint, hear the prompting.  Or we think the next person will do it.  Or we think maybe it will wait for later. Or, or or......

So today, your challenge should you wish to accept it, is to actively look out for the thing God wants you to do or say.... and just do it.

Dec 19th - testimony

I've just got to tell you what happened on Sunday evening.  Such a demonstration of how God cares about all the littlest details.

Last week church was involved in doing a home makeover for a young family who were having a really hard time.  They were moving from private rented housing to council housing just before Christmas and the whole place needed to be redecorated as the previous tenant must have smoked about 100 a day.   There had been a set of very difficult circumstances leading up to that point and the family was exhausted and overwhelmed.  Our church stepped in to offer some help to the other organisations involved.  We picked up our paintbrushes and set to.

I was in the house on Tuesday and the young mother ( let's call her Maya) was there wanting to do what she could to help out.  Other people were supposed to be there too but they didnt show up so it was just the two of us - which of course gave us chance to chat.    Maya and her husband are from Greece *.  They have been in Northern Ireland for a few years and she has been working as a nurse.
The first thing that happened was that she asked me what I did for a living and I told her that I worked for Jo Jingles.  She immediately started telling me that she had been looking into taking her toddler along to classes but wasn't sure how it worked.  So I was able to tell her, encourage her to go, and later speak to my boss to let her know to look out for her.  So that was a nice 'coincidence.'

Then at the end of the week when we had done a really good job on the house we invited Maya to our carol service.  Not because we wanted to recruit her, or emotionally blackmail her or exploit her sense of indebtedness to us in any way..... but just because it was going to be a nice evening and we thought she might enjoy it.   And she came.

The building was packed.  There were probably about three hundred people there and there was barely a seat to be had.  Josh had come with me - Keith was at work and the other two boys had stayed at home.  We nearly always sit on the end of a row but we decided to shuffle into the middle to let others who arrived a bit later get a seat.   As the service was about to start I looked up and there was Maya.  There was one seat next to me and she came over and sat with me.  She had her toddler with her.   Cute as a button and absolutely loved the Christmas carols.  She was clapping her hands and dancing and having a great time and Maya seemed to be really enjoying herself, singing heartily and playing with her daughter throughout.    Halfway through the sermon the toddler got a bit loud and fractious so Maya took her out to the creche.

At the end of the service I was talking to Josh and when I looked round Maya was deep in conversation with the lady who had been sitting on the other side of her.  It turns out that that lady was a member of our congregation who is a fluent Greek speaker!!  Not only that but she is an interpreter - and Maya has recently been thinking that it is time to get out of nursing and possibly go into translating work.   So the two of them exchanged phone numbers and arranged to meet up to talk about a possible career change.

What are the chances of a complete stranger walking into a room of three hundred people and sitting next to the only other person in the room who speaks their language??   One in three hundred I guess  😃   Maya was blown away - she was quite prepared to believe that God had arranged all of that.  And I was blown away by the care that He takes with people.  He knows the smallest details of our lives - from the music classes we want to attend with our kids to the career changes we might be contemplating.  He knows when we need practical help to paint our skirting boards and when we just need to hear someone speaking our mother tongue when we are strangers in a foreign land.

Dont you just love Him?

I've been reading a whole bunch of books in recent weeks for a course Im doing in church.  But one evening watching God at work tells me so much more about Him than any number of pages of doctrine and theology and testimony and teaching.  Wonderful though all that is.  Keep your eyes open.  He is doing this stuff all the time everywhere.  Its exciting to be in on some of His secrets some of the time 😊



(Oh, and for anyone who is interested about 800 Jesus stones went out into the big wide world on Sunday.  Im praying that each one of them will have a story to tell somewhere down the line )

(* I changed their country of origin and jobs in order to further protect their identities )

Dec 18th - non verbal communication

I was sitting in church yesterday behind baby Florence and her parents.  She is about nine months old and as gorgeous as all little ones are at that age.  Utterly dependent on the adults in her life she spent most of the service in Mum or Dad's arms and fell asleep during the sermon only waking up at the end.  She was on her Dad's shoulder during the worship which meant she was smiling and waving and eyeballing me the whole time.  I couldnt focus on singing at all.  I was mesmerised by her.

As I watched her I began to feel God show me how much He loves His kids.  Of course we know this and we have all watched young children and felt that Holy Spirit nudge of comparison.  But today I saw something a bit different.    Florence can't talk yet.  But that didnt stop her from communicating with her Dad.  He was blowing raspberries at her - and she was copying him with her little tongue sticking out.  She saw me clapping my hands and she clapped hers.  She was playing peek a boo from behind her Dad's neck and grinning at me broadly when she caught my eye.  There was so much going on.  But not a word was spoken.

God speaks to us all the time.  But sometimes He doesnt use words.  Just as in yesterday's post I was thinking about showing the world what He is like in our actions every bit as much as in our words, I was struck by how much of God's love comes to us in ' non-verbal' ways.   Im sure you can think of many ways in which you have understood, felt, recognised His love to you......  here are a couple of my stories.

I remember years ago when I was a social worker there was a period of several weeks - maybe months- when I was driving to work every day to Loanhead from Portobello.  Every day in the car I would just have this sense of God's hand on my head.  He didnt say anything.  There was no scripture going through my mind or anything.  But I had an overwhelming sense of His favour on me.  Particularly favour at work.  It was so clear.  And amazing.   Several times Ive been on the beach and I've found stones with messages in them.  I have one piece of rock which has three perfect crosses woven into the grain - its entirely natural rock formation and entirely supernatural that I should have found that one rock on a beach of a gazillion rocks.   I also found a black stone with a perfectly shaped pink heart in it.  And more recently I found one with a fish shape on it.  I suppose when you spend your spare time collecting stones to paint .........😊   Each time I find something like that I know it is a wee gift from my Father who just wants to make me smile.  No words necessary

In these days many people are wondering how to hear God's voice for the first time.  And loads of us who have heard Him for years go through spells when He seems to go very quiet and we wonder what has happened.   Maybe we need to become like little children again - trust that He has us in His arms and that sometimes He has no need for words.  His strong embrace, His loving gaze, the touch of His hand on our face is enough.

And sometimes He wants to blow a raspberry at us.

It delights His heart when we get the joke and blow one right back


Ps.  Guess what?  Raspberry blowing is good for babies development!!  Who knew?!
http://www.chicagoparent.com/learn/health-fitness/raspberries-spit-bubbles-just-drooly-fun-good-developing-babies/

Dec 17th - To Christmas or not to Christmas

I was in a charity shop yesterday and I got talking to the guy behind the counter.  He was in pain and told me he had a hernia but that he couldn't go to the doctor because he was due to go to India and Pakistan in January and was afraid the doc would tell him he shouldn't travel.   I surmised that his trip would be something church related and so I gave him a clue that I was a Christian and sure enough we were soon deep in conversation about........ Christmas.

He said he didnt ' do ' Christmas.  He hated the commercialism, the debt the drinking and the fact that Jan and Feb are the busiest months in abortion clinics.  He said that as a Christian every day should be Christmas and that we should be being salt and light out in the world, not giving out mince pies and mulled wine at carol services in an attempt to attract people in to church.  I didn't disagree with anything he said.   But the way he said it was quite....... forceful.   I had to leave the shops as my parking meter was running out - and I have to confess I was quite glad to have the excuse to go as I felt that the conversation could easily have started to be uncomfortable.

Only after Id left did I realise that we had had quite a serious and animated discussion about the merits or otherwise of celebrating Christmas and I had not actually offered to pray for him about the hernia which was causing him considerable pain.

There is a lesson in that I think.

I'm pretty sure that the kingdom of God is not much or quickly advanced by debate and discussion and arguments over theological niceities.  In fact it is one of the things which ' the world' both despises and doesn't understand about the church.   Why can't we agree with each other and why are we always arguing over points of doctrine?     Jesus didnt spent all that much time talking theology - He spent much more time doing.  Doing miracles and healings and deliverance.  Hanging out with sinners and women and foreigners.  Going to parties and changing water into wine.    Had I offered to pray with the shop guy first I think the conversation would have gone in a whole other direction.   Hey ho.  30 years a Christian and still missing more opportunities than I take 😊

I know we need to always be ready to answer for our faith - but perhaps sometimes the answer we have for people should be more in our actions and less in our words.   The world is weary with words.   What it needs is a demonstration of the kingdom's power and love.

Guess that starts with me.

And you.

Dec 16th - Fun

I was watching Anne Widdicome's Strictly Come Dancing performances last night.  And was laughing out loud at how ridiculous she was - but also had a huge sense of respect for a woman of a certain age who was willing to throw herself into the whole show with such abandon.  She genuinely didn't care that she couldn't dance for toffee.  She was prepared to lay aside her political reputation
and be rather ridiculous to give people a laugh on a Saturday night.  She was so funny and I think the British public fell in love with her just a little bit because she was prepared to have fun.

The other thing I did yesterday was I went to a concert.  The Ulster Orchestra were doing a Christmas gig and I was taken along as by a good friend who wanted to bless me for Christmas.  The orchestra members were all dressed in Christmas costumes.    Most of the brass section were wearing santa suits or elf costumes.  The conductor was sporting a Darth Vader Christmas jumper.   A first violin was wearing a rather fetching christmas pudding dress.  It was really nice to see people who are usually dressed in black for a living being just a little bit crazy because it was Christmas.  ( The concert was a whole heap of festive fun with sing-along bits and lots of seasonal favourites)



It strikes me that if there's any time of the year when we have an excuse to have fun.... this is it!.   At Christmas you are allowed to tell bad jokes and play parlour games and watch corny films and belly laugh with family and friends.   You are actively encouraged to wear a garish Christmas jumper and give your best mate a really embarrassing present.   You are supposed to get down on your hands and knees with small children and play with trains.  And if you get the chance to go to a nativity play or a pantomime you have to join in and sing along and shout and cheer.   It's nice isnt it?  Having the excuse to just loosen up a little bit.  Being given permission to relax and embrace your inner seven year old ?

I know that for some people Christmas this year won't be a barrel of laughs.  But for those of us who can, let's resolve to have more fun.  Let's be a bit sillier, a bit louder and a bit more childlike than we usually are.  Because I genuinely think it's good for us and for those around us.    Jesus told us that we needed to be like little children - and if anyone knows how to have fun kids do.

December 15th. Artistry

I wrote this poem a couple of years ago after a particularly beautiful early morning walk in the park.

God's Artistry on a Winter Morning

The frosted morning biting black                                

gives way to opalescent hues
as sparrow, blackbird, wren and tit
begin to tell their morning news.

In distant reaches of the dawn
the winter sun begins to speak
his memories of warmer days
when he was young in strength and heat

The trees, undressed save for the frost,
in bitter rows resent the cold,
hibernating till the day
when spring once more her green unfolds.

How quickly is the night time past;
the moon, however, full and bright
is not so keen to go to sleep
and vies with sun to give her light.

And now the clouds are tinged with pink
the town awakes to do its duty
so many tardy waking souls
have missed this gift of winter beauty.

God is such an artist.  And not just in the wonderful things He puts in front of us each and every day - the scenery, the face of a loved one, the beauty of the sky and the sea and the marvellous creativity of people.   He is an artist in the way He weaves all of that together into something we don't yet understand because we only see in part.

I was driving the other day when I started to get the impression of someone painting, using a small brush to put hundreds of tiny strokes on a canvas.  Each stroke was a slightly different colour and texture, carefully placed by the artist.  But the whole picture was not evident - it was impossible to tell what it was going to be.  And I felt as though God was saying that every human being who has ever existed has been like a daub of paint on the canvas.  Each one different from the next but each contributing critically to the picture He is painting.  He is painting with purpose and with passion.  The picture He is painting is going to be more breathtakingly stunning than anything we could conceive or imagine.   I think it is something to do with Jesus standing before the Father and saying ' Here I am with the children the Lord has given me' .  Perhaps He is painting a family portrait.  And you and I will be in it along with everyone else who has been adopted through the Holy Spirit by the blood of the babe of Bethlehem.

Dec 14th Homeless

Ive spent a good chunk of this week with a team of people from church renovating a council house for a young couple who have been struggling with some very difficult circumstances and find themselves having to move out of their privately rented house just ten days before Christmas.   Before I met them the only thing I knew was that they were not from the UK and had no family around to support them.  And that they had a young family.     I am ashamed to confess that my first thought was that they would be refugees or migrants from somewhere like Syria, that they probably wouldnt speak English and that they might take the help that we were offering for granted.   I could not have been more wrong.    They are from Spain.  Both speak very good English.  They are employed.   They definitely are deeply grateful for the help we are offering them and are keen to muck in and do whatever they can within the confines of looking after children and working.   They are stressed and overwhelmed by a recent family tragedy followed by a need to move house.  It has been a joy to be able to help them by removing the nicotine of the previous owner from the walls and ceilings with a fresh coat of crisp white paint.

Yesterday afternoon driving home from a stint of painting I heard an article on the news about the dramatic increase in homelessness in the UK.  And it made me think of Jesus being born in a stable and then having to be a refugee in Egypt - presumably with no fixed and permanent home for quite a long time.  And then I realised that not only was Jesus born into a somewhat precarious situation in terms of not having a roof over His head, but He actually chose to be homeless as an adult.

I wonder why He decided to live a wandering, homeless life.  Presumably He didn't need to do that.  He could have lived in one place and travelled back and forth. Commuted  😊  But it seems He chose to wander the highways and byways, staying on friend's sofas, falling asleep in boats.  As I pondered this today I had a sudden thought.  Maybe having a home wasn't important to Jesus.  And perhaps it shouldn't be as important to us as it has become over recent years.

Here in the UK home ownership is still the goal of most people and renting is somehow seen as a ' less good option'.  Being in local authority housing is seen by many as being almost shameful.  And being homeless is, of course, deemed to be terrible and tragic.  Where did such a ridiculous hierarchy of value judgements come from?   Why should it be better to be up to your neck in mortgage debt than living simply in a caravan with no debts?   Who dictated that owning property gives status?

It is ironic that I am having these thoughts today as we currently own four properties and a building site and two of those houses are up for sale!!!!   What would I do if God said ' sell everything you have and give it to the poor and follow me into a lifestyle of owning nothing and having nowhere to call home' ?  The heart part of me would want to say ' sure Lord, no problem'.   But the head would really struggle.

Of the four properties we own, three are rented out at below market rents to people who need a home.   We have always considered that providing people with good quality affordable houses is part of our work for God rather than a for-profit business we are running for gain.  ( the fact is we barely seem to break even once mortgage payments and insurances and vacant periods are  covered)  But nevertheless, we have way way way more assets than most people.  Are we storing up treasure on earth?  We certainly are thinking about what we might be leaving our boys into the future.  But is that God's way of thinking or man's ?    Several years ago I remember being super challenged by a friend of mine who had actively rejected saving into a pension plan because he felt God say that He would look after him in his old age and that he should put his trust in Jesus rather than in a pension scheme.  

It's hard isn't it?  This following Jesus thing.  

I've got a friend who is a monk.  He owns nothing.  He receives a very small amount of money from his order so that he can live.  He has spent decades praying for the peace of Northern Ireland and for healing for the sick.  He is an ordinary bloke with lots of human failings but he is anointed and has authority and walks very closely with Jesus.  I wonder if part of the reason his life is so focused and fruitful is because he is totally unhindered by stuff.  

So today I am challenging us all just to have a little think about the things which we prioritise as important.  Especially our homes and our future plans for homes.   Let us bring those things before God and just double check that our attitudes are righteous, that we are not holding onto anything as a ' right',  that we are deeply grateful for what we do have and not envious of what we don't, and that we do not judge anyone as being any better or worse than us because of the house they do or don't live in.

Dec 13th - non conformism

Im doing a course at church at the moment and it involves having to read a whole load of books and then write book reviews.   Tonight I picked up the next one on the list and opened at the first page.

The first page was dedications.  The second and third and fourth pages were 'endorsements' of the book by very well known Christian leaders and authors.  The next two pages were a Foreward written by another eminent church leader and then there was a two page introduction.  The book proper doesnt start until page 23!!

Am I getting really grumpy and unreasonable in my old age or is there something rather....... umm..... unnecessary about that?  Or worse than unnecessary - actually downright worldly?
The guy who wrote the book is a very well known Christian leader.  Pastor of a huge church, leader of a movement.  I am quite prepared to believe that he has written an interesting and informative book.   But three pages of his mates telling me what a wonderful book it is going to be before Ive even hit the first page...... what's that about?  Surely if it is a good book it will speak for itself.  And surely what is really important is that God speaks to me through this book - no amount of anyone telling me what a great book it is will dictate whether God sees fit to speak to me through it.

Am I being unreasonable or am I justified in being a tad disappointed?

I feel the same way about ' womens meetings'.   I bristle when I walk into a room which is full of candles and flowers and tables strewn with dainty nic nacks.  Do I really go to a church meeting to have my girliness pandered to?  Or do I go to hear the word of God and worship Him and fellowship with fellow warriors and dragon slayers?   😊 

It seems to me that it is SO easy to be infected by the spirit of the age.  To become culturally indistinguishable from the rest of the world.   There is such a fine line to be drawn between being culturally relevant and being both in the world and of it.  As Im getting older Im more and more convinced that we need to be setting the cultural agenda not conforming to it.  Think back a few generations and Christians were at the forefront of the arts, music, invention, medicine , exploration....just about everything in fact.   Now it seems we are lamely trailing behind the world.  Scared to offend. Believing the psychobabble.    Oh dear.  I really am being a bit of a grinch today.  Sorry.

Now Ive got all that off my chest I shall get back to page 24 and see if this book is going to inspire me to be more like Jesus.  I shall let you know in due course . 

Dec 12th - motivation 2

Yesterday 's  Romans 12 gifts survey thingy told me that my motivation is exhortation.   I've done the survey in various forms over a number of years and every time I do it I get the same result.  Exhortation always comes out on top with giving and serving and prophetic  bringing up the rear.  The first time I discovered this it was like a piece of a puzzle finally slotting into place.   I realised that the reason that I do the things that I do is because I have a deep need to encourage and bless and spur people on.  I can see the potential in people and situations.  I love solving problems.  I see the good and am quick to identify peoples gifts and abilities.  I can also quickly spot when someone is struggling.   Knowing that this is the reason - the motivation - behind my character is really helpful.

What is even more helpful is to understand the downsides of being an exhorter.

We exhorters can get upset when people dont receive our encouragements.  We are prone to being easily discouraged ourselves.  One really important thing I have realised about myself is that, in common with other exhorters, I tend to downplay people's sin.  Because I dont like confrontation  I tend to compromise - to err on the side of leniency.   Knowing this helps me to double check myself when Im handing out tea and sympathy and encouraging words.  Sometimes people need a kick up the backside every bit as much as they need an arm round the shoulder.    Being a problem solver I quite often have to take myself to one side and remind myself that actually people are usually able to sort themselves out and they don't need me fixing them all the time.  😊

Your ' motivational gift / gifts' define who you are and they have probably been with you all your life.   A friend of mine messaged me yesterday to say that she had taken the test and it had told her her motivation was teaching.  Guess what?  She is a teacher.    What came first was not the job.  It was the gift that God had placed in her from the moment He was creating her in the womb to be a teacher.  The fact that she ended up teaching for a job was almost co-incidental.  Everything in her life is geared towards imparting learning to others.  She is a housegroup leader, a mother, a grandmother and more.  But in all of these roles her desire is to see people grow in understanding and fulfil every bit of their potential. 

This has nothing to do with being a Christian.  God has given everyone a primary motivation in life - a ' what makes us tick'  .  It is why certain types of people become nurses ( the mercy givers) and others become Policemen and lawyers  ( the prophetic ) or secretaries and office managers ( the administrators)   It is why some people are truly miserable in their jobs - they are doing things which are incompatible with their motivational gifts.    As an exhorter I was always destined to go into something like social work.  Id have been miserable in a job where I was not able to be a problem solving encouragement to people.    From the age of about 4 Josh was sitting his friends in rows and ' teaching ' them in front of a whiteboard he had asked for for Christmas!   If that child doesn't have a teaching motivation I'll eat my hat :)

And what has any of this to do with Advent?
Jesus came to make us who we truly are.  He came to bring life to us in all its fullness and shine a light on the very core of who God has made us to be so that He can display His glory in us.  Jesus knew exactly who He was and what He was here for.   He came so that YOU may know exactly who you are and what YOU are here for.   There is an aspect of God's character and nature in you which makes you more alive than anything else and gives you a sense of purpose and direction nothing else can.  If you can grasp what it is you will be one step closer to being completely whole

Dec 11th Motivation

Im feeling weary.  Sometimes it is tiring being me 😊

Yesterday in church someone precious ( but who I don't know massively well) came up to me with a present and said ' you are always doing things for other people so I thought I'd like to do something for you'.    I was simultaneously amazed and blessed and humbled and chuffed.   How lovely.    And the loveliness was not just the present and the fact that someone had thought about me - but that they had recognised that I think about others.  That made my day.  Because it's true, I do.  And sometimes it gets exhausting.

Many years ago I was introduced to some teaching which changed my life.  It was about spiritual gifts.  Not the Corinthians ones, the Romans 12 ones.

We have different gifts, according to the grace given to each of us. If your gift is prophesying, then prophesy in accordance with your[a]faith; 7 if it is serving, then serve; if it is teaching, then teach; 8 if it is to encourage, then give encouragement; if it is giving, then give generously; if it is to lead,[b] do it diligently; if it is to show mercy, do it cheerfully.

If you imagine that the gifts above are your job as a Christian, then the Corinthian gifts ( tongues, prophecy, healing, interpretation, evangelism etc) are the tools which you can use to get that job done.   If your ' job' in the Christian life is to be a server, then you might from time to time need a word of knowledge or a gift of evangelism or healing.  Those gifts are available to you by the Holy Spirit as and when you need them, but the Romans 12 gifts are who you actually ARE.  If you have the gift of serving then you are a servant in everything you do.  Serving is what makes you tick.  Serving gives you energy and makes you come alive.   If you are a servant you might be happy to teach if someone asks you to........ but only because you enjoy serving and being useful, not because you are a good teacher or feel comfortable in that role.   Do you see what Im getting at???   We all have at least one Romans 12 gift.  Do you know what yours is??

Here's how to find out.   Click on this link and go to where it says ' take the spiritual gifts assessment'.  It will take you two minutes.   And it will help you to discover what Romans 12 gift you operate in.   After years of thinking I was probably a leader-type person I suddenly discovered I wasnt at all.  I was something entirely different.  And that discovery made sense of everything and helped me SO much going forward it is hard to believe.  Now I know precisely and exactly why Im tired.  It is one of the consequences of being gifted in a certain way.

When you have done the assessment go back and have a look at the page which tells you what that means.  

 http://www.timshen.truepath.com/motivational_gifts.htm

Then come back here tomorrow for the second instalment on this subject  👍  (see if you can guess what I am :) )

Dec 10th Lights

I went out shopping yesterday in the late afternoon and by the time Id got to town and let the dogs out and faffed about a bit it was dark.  And the lights were on.  The Christmas ones - all down the high street.  There was a lovely Christmas tree and most of the shops had sparkly twinkly lights in their windows as well as the ones hanging from lamp-posts on each side of the road.   I love it.  Something about the lights at this time of the year makes me happy.

I started thinking about how lovely it is that at this time of year, every year, we get these wonderfully artistic, creative displays in our towns and cities for free.  And then I remembered that when I was very little my Mum bundled my brother and I into the car in our pyjamas and drove from our home in Leeds to Blackpool to see the illuminations.   If you have never been you should go.   I remember we drove really slowly down the seafront ( or wherever they were) gazing open-mouthed at the gazillion lightbulbs in the hundreds of enormous light displays.  It was astonishing - and it was way before the days of every town and high street having their own display, so it really was quite exciting to us as young children.

As I was thinking about this walking down the high street I was suddenly arrested by the image of God breathing into Adam to give him life.   God is light.  He is the Father of lights.  In Him there is no darkness or shadow.  And therefore what he breathed into Adam was light.  Light and life.

Maybe this is why we have a fascination with light.  We are drawn to things that sparkle and dance and  shine.  Think of how we respond to fireworks.  We mark all our major celebrations with lights - down to the candles on the birthday cake or the sparklers, glow sticks, luminous paint and glow in the dark clothing of parties.  We gaze at the stars and wonder about them.  We sing songs about the sunshine and the moonlight and the daybreak.  I wonder if we are drawn to light because God's very breath in us is light.   I suddenly feel incredibly thankful for my eyesight.  How terrible must it be to be in darkness all the time? 

Jesus's birth was heralded by the light of a star and the glory of angels.  Into a dark, dismal, depressing world heading for destruction came the light of the world. And from the moment of His birth everything became illuminated.  We could suddenly see what God was like.  The Scriptures were thrown open and the shrouds of religion were thrown off.  We were no longer like men stumbling along a wall feeling our way in the dark.  We became people of light

 So this Christmas season as we walk through towns adorned with pretty lights and admire the trees lit up in peoples windows, let's remember that God is light.  His Son came to bring that light to us and that we now carry His light with us wherever we go.  May the light that we carry help to show people the way.  And may we bring the same sort of delight and comfort that the Christmas lights bring to young and old alike.

December 9th Temptation

I was standing forlornly on the scales the other day remembering that this time last year I had absolutely promised myself that I was going to lose the weight Id put on the previous year before christmas 2016.   And of course I didnt.  And now here I am saying the same thing to myself again.  Only from the position of being half a stone heavier than I was this time last year.   So depressing.

And then a bit later on I was thinking about the Lord's prayer and those words ' lead me not into temptation' and I had a bit of a penny dropping moment.   I suppose over many years of hearing those words I had somehow always thought of the ' temptation' as being a something specific.  Don't let me stray into sin Lord - break a commandment - steal or lie or covet or murder.   Lord don't let me wander off into error.   But today I suddenly realised that temptation lies not so much in the ' big' things but in the tiny moments of daily life - like the sweets and buns which cause me to put on half a stone a year.  Like the temptation to lie in and not get up when it is cold outside and there is housework to do.   Like breaking the speed limit when Im late.   Like being mean and cross when I speak to my kids.   So many tiny ' temptations' every day.  And I fall down on them all the time.

Funnily enough, having been thinking about this today I then went on Facebook to find a friend had posted a link to the Pope who is suggesting a change in that line of the Lord's prayer.   He says that ' lead us not into temptation'  is not a good translation from the original as it gives the impression that it is somehow possible for God to place us in harms way.  He suggests a better wording might be something like  ' do not let us fall into temptation'  ( which is what I have always taken it to mean anyway)  God doesnt push us into sin...... we choose it, we do the falling, we have to deal with the consequences.

I have to confess that I don't pray the Lord's prayer every day.  Now that Im no longer attending an Anglican church I don't even pray it once a week.   But I probably should.  Because I clearly need God's help in the little things.  Every time I open the fridge.  Or get offered a biscuit I dont need. 
                                                      
One of the verses in the Bible which most amazes me is Hebrews 4;15 

For we do not have a high priest who is unable to empathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are--yet he did not sin.

Jesus knows all about temptation - and He didnt just understand the theory He experienced the pain of it.  

Because he himself suffered when he was tempted, he is able to help those who are being tempted.  Heb 2 :18      

Temptation tears us in two.  It produces a war in our souls - we know what we should do but the desire to do the opposite can be excruciating.  Im pretty sure none of us will ever go through the sort of temptations which faced Jesus in the desert and in the garden, let alone those which most assuredly leered at him and lured him every one of His days on earth.   But most of us at some point will struggle with the temptation to cheat or lie or steal.  We might lust after something or someone which we can't have.  We might be tempted to join in with the office gossip or not be entirely righteous in our finances.   And what about how we spend our time and what we watch on television?  The more I look at it the more I realise that temptation is everywhere , in the little things we can so easily excuse or ignore.  But God says  BE HOLY.  What sets us apart as Christians should be the fruit of the Spirit in our lives......  one of which is self control.

So as I look forward to a couple of weeks of gluttony and over indulgence I think I need to be praying harder than ever before '  Lord don't allow me to succumb to temptation.  Give me the same iron will that You had to turn your face from everything which was unhelpful, shadowy, impure.  Help me to set my face like flint towards the prize and run with confidence, not tripping up over the small obstacles on the road'

There's nothing wrong with the odd mince pie.  It's just that I find it so hard to stop at one.  Lord help me!!